Fail (not epic yet though)

I really enjoy chess, be it international or chinese. However, i haven't really played either for 3 years, mainly because nobody plays with me. Somehow, my closer circle of friends in jc does not include anyone remotely interested in chess. So i find myself missing the good old days back in RI when i do not even have to look for someone to play chess with, challenges by friends simply come my way.

So, it's been 3 long years since i last played against credible opposition(inter-hse chess tournament in jc). I've more or less forgotten most of my tactics and with the recent job hunting, chess has somewhat slipped out of my mind.

Until my US trip. New York, Union Square. I was walking into the subway to get abit of shelter from the cold when i saw this black guy with a chess board, challenging people to a game of chess for money. So i watched as a white guy took up the challenge, and took the position of white(lol).

His opening move: e3 (king pawn 1 step up)
'Wtf' was the first thing that came to my mind. Why did he open with such a defensive move when he's playing white? Evidently, the black guy wasn't expecting this as well, and took a long time pondering this opening move. I didn't continue watching, as i was too cold. but my interest in chess had been rekindled.

Considering i lacked a partner, i decided to play chess titans! The free game that comes with windows vista. Having smashed level 2 and 5 before(a good example of non-credible opposition), i attempted level 7. And while the comp was good indeed, it was the most time-wasting game i've ever played. Just look at how it ended.





A human opposition does not need to play to this conclusion before deciding that it's a draw, damn it. People usually propose a draw, and then move on to the next game. No way you can do that against a comp. so fight all the way i did. to such a conclusion. While it may have a been a draw(a hard earned one), I was outplayed for long periods in the match. Great opening, trashy mid game, before struggling to a draw. Way too rusty after 3 years. Couldn't even see through certain moves by the comp. But i wasn't convinced. I can win this, i thought, so here comes the rematch.



FAIL. And another waste of time. Damn the comp for being so good at eating my pawns. I give up. for now. need to find a way to brush up my skills again...

Teaching, the noble profession

I never wanted to teach. Part of it stems from the fear that students will be assholes and mess up your lessons. The other part comes from the excruciatingly long hours teachers work. Yes, official working hours are similar to that of a student, where you start work at 7.30am and end at 1.35pm. And then you go home, everyone who is not a teacher will tell you that. Ah relaxing indeed.

That view is way too simplistic. That argument, you do realise, can be reversed to say that student life is way too relaxing. You start at 7.30am, end at 1.35pm, and go home and sleep till the next day. REALLY? Was that how your days as a student were? The answer would definitely be no. You complained, there's too much school work, there're afternoon lessons, there's cca, there's this, there's that. THE SAME GOES FOR A TEACHER AND MORE.

A teacher would have afternoon lessons, pupils staying back to ask more questions and to discuss problems, 120 times more school work than the student(assuming 4 classes of 30 each), a need to prepare for lessons(where do you think those powerpoint slides come from?), cca trainings to attend, random courses to go for, and plenty of staff meetings to attend. The hours are actually longer than the typical 8-5 jobs you find around.

So why am i teaching? The reasons have changed greatly over the past few weeks. What started out as a gesture of goodwill is now a drive to see certain students do well. By now, most of you should roughly know the events leading up to my appearance back at RI that gave many teachers a pleasant surprise. Nevertheless, i'm still getting questions on that and i don't want to repeat myself for the 100th time, hence i'm gonna write it down here and refer anyone who asks to this place.

28th dec(5491 south hyde park blvd, chicago, IL 60615) 8.30pm
I was freezing happily alone in my sis' room, attempting to assess the net on my E51 phone when it rang. To be exact, it vibrated, as my phone is permanently on silent mode. It was a message from a former teacher back in RI, requesting a discussion. As I was in chicago, i asked him to send an email, which i checked with my phone. In it, the mail says that he'll be on mc for the first 2 weeks, and as he is teaching Raffles Academy students(advanced physics), he hopes i can help by relieving him for those 2 weeks. Knowing that he is probably running out of options(i'm probably the weakest in the entire sci club quiz team in my batch) and as a 'repayment' for all the help he has rendered over my years in RI, i agreed.

26th jan(1 Raffles Institution Lane) 1pm
Fast forward to today, and i've accepted another teaching offer. This time, it isn't just a gesture of goodwill. There is more to it. So what has changed? Where has the fear of the students and long hours gone to? Well, the fundamental point that has changed is my own perception of how teaching should be. Teaching is about helping students, just like how i've received help from my teachers in the past. However, students have to be willing to help themselves before they can be helped, a point well put across by Saw IV(all go watch the Saw series, plot is very amazing). That said, i simply can't be bothered by the idiots who mess around in class, but in every class i've been to, even a supposedly weak sports class, i see students with a drive to study, to understand the concepts behind what drives this world. 'How water goes up a straw due to pressure, how the moon looks like a line instead of a ball across the sea due to reflection' It's this drive that forces me to ignore the clowns, and to focus on helping those who want to help themselves. And i really hope they do well.

What about the long hours? Sure that can't be helped, every job has its own bad points, and this is what a teacher must cope with. furthermore, marking physics papers is a hell lot easier than marking english papers. Only bad point is in booking and preparing a lab lesson.

so for anyone who's jobless and has persevered to the end of this long post, here's a reward for you. A JOB! There's an opening to relief teach upper sec physics at RI. If you think what u've read above is what you're looking for as well, teaching is for you. Contact me if you want the job! I can help you get it!


On a side note, i'm amazed by some teachers' memories. They can still remember my name after all these years, even though i'm not prominent to most of them(except physics teachers). Truly amazing. Ms Pang from rjc PE dept remembers me. cool.

Jury

The Jury

Uses of the Jury

The Jury is described as the 'Bulwark of our liberties' in Ward v James. The jury represents the just face of the law. Because they are not trained in law, they are not bound by the black and white letters of the law and many of its issues. Instead, they can use their conscious to decide whether the defendant should be liable or not. Unlike the judges or the lawyers, they are not bound by the evidence, they have no prior knowledge and hence can be said to weigh the evidence that is presented before them without any biasness. They are also the representation of society, especially in a community of democracy, public involvement has never been more important to make contain the abuse of power that is likely to be in courts in cases that favouritism arises.

Problems of the Jury.

1. Racial Discrimination

To explain its racial discrimination would first be to understand how the jury is selected. The Lord chancellor has derived a method of collecting jury members from the electoral roll, but this has proven to lead to problems mainly that the electoral roll does that truly reflect the composition of citizens in the UK. Based on Darbyshire, many minority ethnic groups do not register themselves with the electoral roll for a variety of reasons, even including evading council tax. However, courts have taken a strict approach as to modifying the jury make-up. In R v Ford, the courts maintained that it would be overstepping of the judge's powers to grant a change in jury, even in cases that involved race. However, studies conducted by Ugwuegbu indicated that whites tend to rate a black defendant more culpable than a white, which clearly shows the racially discrimination that exists. Yet while courts say that they are not trying to be racially discriminatory, in the IRA cases that were held the jury could not have any people from Ireland involved. Does this then mean that the jury is biased towards the majority race in the UK?

2. How the jury arrives at decisions.

Much of how the jury arrives at their decisions is unknown because it is a rule that no one can question the decision reached by the jury. For someone to question the jury would be unfair to the other party, as juries can rely on a couple of reasons above that of evidence, for example, self-consciousness, pity, and many more. However, the problem with this is that there can be no accountability on the jury's part. The unpredictable way the jury decides often leaves lawyers and judges vexed. For example, in R v Young, the jury used a medium to call back the dead from the spiritual world in order to find out if the defendant was guilty. Such absurd ways not only makes the losing side to cry out unjust but also they diminish the whole concept of having a legal system.

Moreover, different people tend to have different ways of arriving to conclusions. From the evidence by Vidmar and Hans, the research found that people tend to form alliances with people of similar thinking, notwithstanding the evidence that was displayed. These alliances can cause a huge influence over the minority in the jury hence often leading to unanimous votes. Another research by Sealy and Cornish also found that women tend to convict more than men in mock rape trials. The inconsistency and over usage of unconventional methods lead to many parties crying foul.

3. Understanding Directions

Another problem to the jury is that since they have not been legally trained, it is very difficult for them to understand the directions that lawyers and judges give. The technical jargon is a barrier, certainly something should be done to let the jury understand better, and certain courts have started to issue out directions in printed form so that the jury can go through it slowly, but this measure has not yet been implemented in all courts. The Auld report also gives suggestions such as allowing the jury to ask questions and take down notes. By all logic this would seem practical and only aid in serving justice better but courts are generally against this because such unprofessional asking would tamper with the cases put forward by the prosecution and defendant, risking an unfair verdict.

Also, there have been many criticisms from the directions given by the judges. Because of the eloquence of judges, it is often very easy to give a biased direction to the jury which subtly includes the opinion of the judge, hence making the verdict unsafe. Also, another issue is the problem of beyond reasonable doubt. Although the judge would give the jury the direction that the prosecution or defence has proven the case beyond reasonable doubt, there is doubt and conflict in the issue of reasonableness. Is it 100%? Or merely more than satisfactory? Most of the jury would think that it is 100%, and that would mean it would be almost impossible to convict anyone, but the level of reasonableness cannot be set that easily. Studies have shown that even judges cannot give a definite percentage, and gave results from between 80% to 100%.

4. Other Problems

The often lengthy trial process is one which affects the jury's decision. Studies have shown that in such cases the jury often reaches a verdict out of boredom, they do not have the capacity or ability to process every single piece of evidence. Moreover, certain trials can last over months, and hence some jury may forget some important evidence. This lengthy process also means that the jury is subjected to more bullying and more swaying. As fatigue kicks in, it is easy for lawyers or judges to influence the jury and secure a desired result.


Yet, despite all these problems that stem from the jury, why is it still that the legal system is unwilling to abolish the jury system? The main reason is that the jury represents the just face in the legal system. Since the past, convicted criminals were given the choice to opt for jury or non-jury trial. Jury trial was favoured for the basic reason that the jurors were people whom the criminal could associate with, and not some hardened solicitor or prosecutor who did nothing more than sprout complex legal theories that the criminal would not be able to understand.

CJS

The Criminal Justice System

The problems faced can roughly be divided into

1. The Adversarial system.

The adversarial system is a characteristic of the UK legal system. Unlike the Inquisitorial system, it emphasizes more on parties’ participation in court. However, this traditional system poses some problems. For one, an adversarial system in the UK has been complained as encouraging trials to proceed in a competition based format. It is like a debate contest where 2 parties will display each others cases and attempt to strike down the other's case. The judge will sit in an umpire position, with little or no intervention at all. The problems have called for reforms to take place, such as the Runciman Commission, which involves changing certain trial proceedings such as a pre-requisite to give a summary of the cases each party would present before entering the courtroom, or that the judge now has new found powers to call certain witnesses to court without anybody's notice (from the report by Sanders and Young). This however has been protested by the fact that the UK system is no longer traditionally adversarial, many of such reforms tend to shift it to an inquisitorial style. The most basic of the adversarial system is that the 'truth is best discovered by powerful statements on both sides of the question', but the intervention of judges and the like now pose a question of whether the system has changed for the better or worse. For one, it could be better if the judges made due process to call out important witnesses that might drastically affect the outcome of the proceedings, but it is also possible that only witnesses which the judges favour might end up being called upon, hence creating a biased viewpoint, no more an 'umpireal' role.

The introduction of the CPIA (Criminal Procedures and Investigation Act) has led to a requirement for the police to disclose any information that might help the suspect or in otherwise undermine the prosecution's case, but then again it is pretty much up to the police if they want to disclose it or that since they might easily argue that they thought that the evidence was of no importance and might not have any undermining effect at all.

2. The Evidence Collection.

The collection of evidence in criminal cases would most certainly be collected by the police. For example, the suspect or witnesses are usually interrogated by the police. The problem posed by this is that many atime people would not know what goes on during the police interrogation. Cases such as the Cardiff Three seem to suggest that even torture or a forced confession is possible in police interrogations. All these have seemingly been solved by recent acts such as Police and Criminal Evidence Act 1984, where regulations such as a compulsory taping of interrogations be made, but that does not take away the root of the problem. Now, interrogations are psychology specialists, trained in asking leading questions that would tend to confuse the ordinary mind. Questions like 'You killed him, didn't you', 'you put the poison there didn't you', are just a few examples where the suspect is expected to say 'yes' and more often than not the untrained ones would be unwittingly deceived into confession, maybe in an indirect manner even. Another factor is the often excessively long hours of police interrogation done. In order to escape the psychological hell in an interrogation room, many atimes suspects would give in and succumb to the questions and give a confession even. Although some action has been done to reduce this problem (s37-s44 PACE ACT 1984), by limiting the time that interrogations take place, untrained suspects would still find it difficult to cope with such long questioning hours. The fact that interrogations are still held in police stations means that the police would still have the overall control of the situation; it would be difficult to enforce such a rule as well.

Due to technological advances, the police can also now rely on forensic science to crack criminal cases. Good as it might sound; the forensic scientists are often not trained to give an evaluative answer to the forensic evidence. For example, in the case or Judith Ward, the court prosecuted her solely based on the forensic evidence of gunpowder in her pocket and derived a conclusion that she was involved in the murder. However, in the end, after serving long years in prison, they decided that the gunpowder was of negligible amount to base a case on that and hence she was acquitted. Often, scientists are asked to find out if a substance is present, for example gunpowder, but to determine whether or not it is of substantial quantity is different. Scientists cannot take an empirical data and say, oh this is just barely sufficient because scientists work with definite values. People such as the judge, the prosecutors, the layman, would not know how much is considered sufficient and hence the case is normally based on minor circumstantial evidence. Furthermore, such tests are often not done in a properly sterilized environment. Scientists have to rely on the police to collect samples from the site, but often how clean are the samples? It is possible that contamination can occur and substances originally not in the sample can be detected. Even Glidewell J in R v Ward proclaimed that forensic scientists may become partisans

3. The police.

Due to the fact that the police are the main one to get the evidence, it is often the case to say that the defendant would have very little access to the evidence. Often, as explained by the issue on lengthy interrogation hours, defendants are unable to recall what they said during the interrogation hence even their lawyers have a very difficult time to develop a case to help their client.

Another issue is the way the police construct cases. Since the adversarial system is a debate, it would make little sense for the police to disclose every single bit of information. Instead, information is sieved out into what would help the prosecution's case and they would exclude most of the important evidence that would likely help the defendant's case. As such, the case construction by the police is very much a one-sided affair. It just further serves to deny the defendants from utilizing useful information. Also, it has been complained that sometimes the police can construct cases based on very circumstantial evidence. By excluding certain information, they can construct a case such that all guilt points to the defendant, and often, the defendant, being non-experienced the wars of eloquence would end up agreeing to most of what the prosecutor says and this affects the defendant's case in the jury's eyes. All this is well in the adversarial system if the defendant had a similar approach and similar resources, but they have neither. The case put forward by the prosecution can hence be so strong that it can withstand scrutiny by anybody else.

Another abuse on the police's part is the creation of facts. For example in the Guildford Four case, 4 suspects were convicted based on a letter which had incriminating evidence. However, it was only discovered after a few years that the letter had been heavily edited such that the guilt pointed to the four suspects because the original note containing many cancellations and amendments which matched that of the note produced in court had been found. The fact that the police got away with nothing more than a mere apology statement makes matters worse. This just acknowledges the abuse of the police's discretionary powers. Imagine if that note was never found! The four innocent suspects would have spent a lifetime in jail!

Also, on the police's discretionary powers, they are empowered with the powers to make an arrest on reasonable suspicion, this is based on the PACE Act 1984, as usual, the concept of reasonableness is vague. What would constitute a police officer to reasonably suspect someone? For example in the case of Murray v UK, Mrs Murray was held under arrest in her house while the soldiers went around searching the house for any criminal evidence. However, the courts ruled that the police had such a power to arrest on reasonable suspicion and this just puts academicians into further confusion onto what exactly reasonable would constitute. It would be that reasonable suspicion is lower standard than information sufficient to establish a prima facie case looking at Shaaban Bin Hussien v Chong Fok Lam. However otherwise than that there are no cases which would seem to deny police of their discretionary powers; such was the case of Castorina v Chief Constable of Surrey.

4. The Lawyers.

Often, it is the prosecution who has the upper hand than the solicitors based on a variety of reasons.

Although claimed to be an independent body, the Crown Prosecution Service CPS is actually very dependent on the police for evidence. As from the Runciman Commission, the doctrine of separation of powers was emphasized. However, the only source that the CPS can get its evidence from is only the police. It is the fact, and often the CPS relies on the police statements to make a case, often which is already very one-sided. Up against the well endowed CPS are the defendant and not always his lawyer because of extraordinary legal fees. Moreover, due to expensive legal fees, it is often difficult for defendants and their lawyers to meet up. Even with legal aid it does not solve the issue as the aid is unwilling to finance many meetings. This would mean few can have the privilege of getting a strong case in the defence, save the lawyers who are willing to work for justice than for financial reward.

The Problems with the Appeal Process.

1. The Legal Aid

Many atimes convicted suspects are not rich hence they have to rely on legal aid. Legal aid is given based on a means test and if successful all legal costs would be borne by the help scheme. However, without legal aid, appellants run the risk of having to pay extra legal costs to the COA if they deem it necessary. The factor of high costs without the certainty of a successful appeal is what deters most people from applying.

Even after a successful funding, many legal aids are not willing to pay for extra meetings with solicitors and clients because this would incur extra costs. The concept of minimising costs often makes it difficult for the lawyer and his client to discuss the major issues and greatly hampers the effectiveness of the appeal.

2. The lawyers

Though blessed with legal aid, the lawyers have a major role to play in many failed appeals. Erroneous advice such as sentencing would become longer if the appeal fails deter people from appealing. Moreover, while most of the time lawyers are the ones at fault for losing the case, they do not admit it for the reason of saving their reputation, rather than to save the client's liberty. Not that we can blame them either, Many lawyers are bound to the problem of not having enough data to form their case because clients are often unwilling or unable to provide them with what they had said during the police interrogation. People might have the viewpoint that the police is the higher evidence collection authority and think that once they had said it to the police every single detail would be taken to account, which, as discussed above prove otherwise.

Bottoms and Maclean even quoted that convicted persons feel that the appeal process is a somewhat remote affair that is best left to professionals. The overestimation of risks involved by the lawyers is often also the ones that make clients feel that appeals are somewhat hopeless.

3. The time limit.

UK has a 28 day time limit for appeals to be made. However, the problem here is often the rigidity of the system to not except any appeals even if it was submitted just after 28 days. This just reflects the stand of the COA that they treat many verdicts with finality and are quite unwilling to accept appeals.

4. Common law.

The historically restrictive approach that courts have to appeals is also main deterrence factors. Based on the Criminal Appeals Act 1995 appeals are only allowed if the COA feels that the verdict has been unsafe. This is not withstanding unfair verdicts even, following the case of R v Kennedy and R v Mills. It would take either some fresh evidence or some major mistake in the principles of law before the appeal would be allowed, or in some cases new issues that can be considered to have great weight on the verdict.

CCRC

The Criminal Cases Review Commission was established in the 1997, during the period that the HRA 1998 came into effect. The purpose of the CCRC was to take over the COA's duty in reviewing appeal cases. They would evaluate which criminal cases should make it to the COA based on the arguments, fresh evidence, and the principles of law that could have been flawed in the previous trial. However, despite the CCRC's efforts to make the appeal process better, as it was the intention in the Runciman Commission, new problems have arisen instead while solving some old ones.

1. The police.

Because the CCRC is state owned, it gets its evidence from the police. This pretty much defeats the purpose of the appeal process because, as discussed earlier, the police have quite a large part to play in the miscarriages of justice. However, the CCRC has said that the police have satisfied its requirements for the evidence and it is actually quite impossible for the CCRC to use other methods of investigation as well, especially since factors such as high costs, shortage of manpower are involved.

2. The Legal Aid

There is no legal aid available for those appeals that go through the CCRC, and this is detrimental for the people who cannot afford legal fees. Similar to the previous appeal process, appellants would have to pay their lawyers to go through the CCRC but not having legal aid just means that more people would not be able to afford this method of appeal and there are but few lawyers who would be willing help their client for little financial rewards.

3. Shortage of Staff

The CCRC has had a severe shortage of resources for a very long time, such that many appeal cases take not months, but years to process. This extremely slow appeal system would mean that the appellant would pretty much have spent a long duration in prison already before even the appeal is heard which leads to a lot of unfairness. Moreover, due to the excessive workload, now the CCRC has chosen to take the approach to settle the high profile cases which are most likely to succeed, leaving those mundane appeals to a corner. How exactly the CCRC views cases as important are even a mystery, making it very difficult for one to appeal through this channel.

4. Views of the courts.

Despite its shortfalls, there has been none but good praise for the CCRC. In Mattan and Ex Parte Pearson, the courts said that the CCRC was an indispensible committee in delivering and solving the miscarriages of justice. Reasons why people would still go along with the CCRC despite its shortfalls are because it would be easier to get an appeal, notwithstanding the time that is taken. However, for the CCRC to be really effective isn't it plain that more resources should be allocated for cases to be processed faster? Why in the counter against miscarriages are the authorities so slow to provide?

common sense

If something is making you pissed, you stop utilising it. That is common sense.

Unfortunately, that is something i haven't been practising for a while now. In other words, i've been lacking common sense for some time now.

Today shall be the day I start practising some form of common sense.

FOOD!!!

I miss good food. To be specific, the good food i had in the US. No, this is not to say that singapore doesn't have good food. On the contrary, singapore has alot of good food too. It's simply because i don't have the spending capacity that i had back in the US. I'm pretty broke now, so i've just been scrimping on food in sg. haha

So anyway, what good food did i have in the US? Let's just start by saying that within 21 days in the US, i've tried more different kinds of cuisine than i have over the 20 years of my life. And it's the first time, i've ever been in a fine dining restaurant. Damn awesome, damn awestruck. And i documented everything i ate down. So here they are!

For you people who are reading this, you can just take note of the good food(which are in bold), as well as what i feel are the value for money food(which are in italics)(bold and italics means both lor), and then try them yourself next time or something. The pictures will be uploaded soon(when i say soon it can be up to 6 months?), if not on this note, then in a US photos album.

here goes.(format will be ) btw, the price is sgd is for those of you who keep telling me, "Actually that's not very ex what". Look at price after conversion. It is damn ex.

Day 1, 11th dec.
dinner - Sakura - aki soba - $9($12.60)
My first meal in the states is at a random karaoke place. well done.
Day 2
lunch - Morton's of chicago - Seafood platter, chicago style steak, chocolate cake - $80($112)
Best meal ever, most expensive too. I can have 37 meals in sg in the price of this.
dinner - Medici - Pizza, Quesadilla - $14($19.60)
not bad, but dun think i can classify this as good. Above average, i would say.
3
lunch - random place at wicker park - pulled pork sandwich - $11($15.40)
The serving was big, plus they were having a discount for burgers for $5. which would make it very worth it. The price quoted here is without the discount.
dinner - Saint Alps - Pork with rice, green bubble tea - $12($16.80)
Their bubble tea is supposed to be really good.
4
brunch - Original Pancake House - shared too much stuff, can't rmb - $10($14)
dinner - random vietnamese restaurant - pho - $10($14)
5
lunch? - Rocky Mountain - caramel apple - $5($7)
flight day, so didn't have a proper lunch. but the random caramel apple i bought at the airport was really nice. i dun rmb the stall le.
dinner - Mill restaurant - kimchi stew - $12($16.80)
6
lunch - Cafe Boulud - lobster bisque, grilled leg of lamb, pineapple gingerbread upside down cake - $45($63)
dinner - random street cart hot dog - $3(4.20)
7
lunch - Giovanni Vintecinque - mussels, bite-size veal, coffee with biscuit - $32($44.80)
dinner - 5 napkins - some burger, can't rmb le - $20($28)
8
lunch - The Petrossian - smoked salmon, grilled flank steak, seasonal fruit tart - $30($42)
dinner - Chipotle - burrito - $8($11.20)
9
lunch - Ippudo - Seafood with mentaiko, ramen - $20($28)
dinner - random chinatown restaurant - spare rib rice, mapo tofu - $9($12.60)
10
lunch - Grimaldi's Pizzeria - pizza with a hell lot of extra random toppings - $17($23.80)
BEST PIZZA EVER!!! ok maybe not, hard to say. but it sure is damn good.
dinner - random japantown restaurant - ramen, yakitori, unagi tofu, salmon, fried fish cake - $13($18.20)
11, 21st dec
brunch - Good Enough to Eat - red snapper with fries - $14($19.60)
This place is supposed to be highly recommended. but i found nothing special with what i ordered. maybe i should have tried their omelettes. but oh well. and I FORGOT TO TIP! shit.
dinner - Macdonalds - angus third pounder - $4($5.60)
XY said "let's eat here". So i ended up eating at the restaurant which some of you know i dislike, but it turned out to be not bad. hell lot better than sg anyway. So now i only dislike SG MACDONALDS!
12
breakfast - Ess-A-Bagel - Chocolate chip cream cheese bagel - $3.50($4.90)
Their bagels are damn huge and damn nice! so huge that i got sian of my choc chip bagel halfway and had to throw about half away. It kept me full for the rest of the day...
dinner - Macdonalds - angus third pounder - $4($5.60)
XY and Heng Jie again. Macs again. haha but that's cuz we had to catch a broadway show. I like the 1/3 pounder so much i had it again. but with a different topping of cuz.
supper - Planet Hollywood Cafe - VIP platter, California ranch chicken pizza - $13($18.20)
13
breakfast - Ess-A-Bagel - Cream Cheese bagel - $2.35($3.29)
Leftover bagel from previous day. Still nice, still good. Lasted me through lunch again. I liked this one better than the choc chip one though.
dinner - Pinch and S'Mac - pizza, macaroni and cheese - $7($9.80)
Probably the best meal i had in the US factoring in both price and food. Credit to Heng Jie and Xun Yong for finding this place. Thanks!
14
brunch - Noche Mexicana - tamales - $9($12.60)
This place is supposed to make one of the best tamales in new york, but since i've never eaten a tamale before this, i have no basis for comparison. It was not bad though. And they give free chips.
dinner - Pan Ya - Beef curry - $7($9.80)
lol the name looks and sounds like ponyo.
post dinner - Saint Alps - pearl milk tea - $3.25($4.55)
back to the famous bubble tea.
15
lunch? - shortbread with chocolate - $1($1.40)
another flight, another screwed up meal.
dinner - some chinatown restaurant - soup, chicken, salted spicy prawn, vegetable with double mushroom, desert - $12.50($17.50)
Went to chinatown cuz everywhere else is closed on christmas day. Food turned out to be good, but didn't take note of restaurant name due to cold.
16
lunch - Ribs and Bibs - Ribs and fries - $10.50($14.70)
The bbq sauce was awesome! and the smell lingers on your fingers for a while. I dunno if that is disgusting or what, but the smell was so nice, i liked it.
dinner - Mellow Yellow - Chilli spaghetti with cheese - $7.50($10.50)
17
breakfast - Treasure Island - Apple turnover - $1.19($1.67)
lunch - Maxwell Street Market - Quesadillas and taco - $4.75($6.65)
The street food was surprisingly good, but the weather was too cold for me to enjoy it much.
dinner - Portillo's Hot Dogs - hot dog, burger - $6.50($9.10)
After you eat the hot dog here, you'll realise sg hot dogs cmi. damn good stuff. and it's only $2.45.
18
brunch - Original Pancake House - Apple Pancake - $11($15.40)
This was so huge i couldn't finish it.
dinner - Uncle Joe's Jerk Chicken - jerk chicken dinner - $10.50($14.70)
19
brunch - Leftover Apple Pancake - FREE!!!
dinner - Rodity's - flaming saganaki, moussaka - $23($32.20)
The flaming saganaki(fried cheese) here is amazing.
20
breakfast - some chinatown eatery - congee, toast, milk tea - $4($5.60)
dinner - Pizzeria Due - deep dish pizzas(numero uno, spinach) - $9.20($12.88)
Wooh i managed to get a taste of a unique chicago dish on my last day in chicago. How fortunate.
21, 31st dec
breakfast - mini donuts - $2
Clearly, i have a flight to catch.

So my total expenditure on food alone comes up to 531 USD. which is about $743 in sgd. which can easily last me for 4 months back in sg. crap. well at least it meant that in 21 days, i've tried jap, korean, chinese, greek, american, mexican, carribean, italian, and french cuisines. Something which i haven't achieved in 20 years in sg.
ok yay, now that i've written this down, i can clear some space in my memory for some other stuff. woohoo. more random US posts to come i think.

Change, the only constant

When returning to an old place such as your alma mater, most people get a nostalgic feeling that slowly wears off with time spent there.
I, on the other hand, had it the other way round. The first few days of my return back to RI was marked with deep anxiety and apprehension as I prepared to walk unprepared into a class of people I have never met nor dreamt i would meet. Lab sessions had to be prepared, certain topics had to be revised, lessons had to be planned. And so the first few days passed in a flurry of activity that did not allow time for my previous post mentioned thoughts to settle down.

Those thoughts have still not settled down yet, but now that the flow of teaching has been started, the anxiety that numbed my mind has now given way to a new clarity that allows me to view my surroundings in greater detail and thought.

Same old school, but with new surroundings, being viewed from a different perspective, viewed in a different time frame. We've only left RI for 5 years and RJC for 3 years, but the changes to the school are so great it feels like i've left for 10 years. Management of the school, running of the school, all the way to the physical aspects of the school have been almost thoroughly changed. Listing the changes here would take forever. You guys have to see it and experience it for yourselves. I'll upload a few pictures of the school(jc side) soon(hopefully together with my US pics and maybe my taiwan pics too), and you guys can see for youself just SOME(not all) of the physical changes. I cannot capture all the changes. Every corner you turn, something has changed(and is still changing).

So why do i have photos of RJC(or rather RI, the jc side, as what it's called now)? I decided to walk there! haha since it was
1. so near
2. rjc open house(13th jan)
3. a good opportunity to meet and catch up with former teachers, which i've already done for the RI side.
And so i found ms june tan, who somehow still remembers most(if not all) of us. Tried to look for mr francis chong and mr paul cheong but both were in a meeting. The rest are not around anymore(or so i think). So i spent some time taking in the amazing changes to rj, as well as catching up with random friends i found around school who've gone back for the open house too.
Anyway, i found mr paul cheong today(14th jan). He's still full of rubbish. and rj's staff room is super duper huge.

So for those of you who have yet to visit the school after all this while, do go back and take a look(and be amazed like me). The bridge connecting the new RI block(raja block) and rjc is gone, so walk by the first floor. yup. That's all for now! Gotta rush off for advanced physics lesson. 2 hrs.(knn since when was there 2 hr straight lessons in our time?) Will be posting more stuff(regarding US and school) soon, so dun worry sc!

lalala
ys

Reality

It's ridiculously classic, hopelessly cliche, yet all the more true, all the more significant for it.

As I sit here, with my hands still reeking of disinfectant, I cannot help but wonder at how much time has passed over the years, and how I simply glossed over certain things. I wonder at the seeming permanence of people, of things, and of the true fleeting transience that can rob you of things most precious without the luxury of an instant's notice.

There are some things I have always been dimly aware of, yet singularly failed to realise its true significance. There are some things I have always taken for granted, until harsh reality had me around the throat, and refused to let go. The helplessness and frustration experienced feeds upon themselves, building with each single moment of helpless waiting. The myriad feelings of anxiety, concern, and worry concentrated and overflowed within my heart, and it was then that I was painfully reminded of the fragile balance my life stood upon, and my life, my family, is not immune to the trials and tribulations that others underwent. I realised the extent of love and concern I felt for my family (yes, and you, my friends, too) completely overwhelmed any petty arguments or squabbles in the past, and I remembered two words which had whispered past my ears so many times, but only now did I truly comprehend its true meaning -- 'Carpe Diem'.

Ordeals bond people together, but I would sooner not go through them, for the ruthless hurt it deals to those people I care about. This particular one may be a relatively minor one, but I can sense the darkness it portends...distant and insignificant, but hauntingly present nonetheless.

I write this not as a simple blog post, but to remind myself of what I felt this day. That one day, when things have all returned to complete (?) normalcy, and everything falls back to the same routine, all things will eventually be taken lightly once more, except perhaps for the light, yet indelible mark, the specter of dread haunting the very back of my mind.

It is inevitable, though I hate to say it, I can see myself with startling clarity -- no matter how hard I try, I will eventually revert back, for it is human nature to do so. Once past, the mind does not dwell overmuch upon certain matters unless one desires it, and it is the nature of all feelings and memories to fade with time. Already, as one feels the familiar surroundings, memories fade. One day, I will read this, and know that I have once thought like this.

Until the next ...which does not even bear thinking about.

Cliche. But there you go. That's life. I'm human too.



As an afterthought, I wonder: Have I been changed, or is it the same me? Is this change permanent? But I cannot say.

spamblog.com

Ok it's my turn to make a post now. Happy New Year everyone and the best wishes in your endeavours.

before i get started, i would like to highlight again to rard the questions raised previously by ys: what does the number 897, and what's the fine print about? it's ok, you can tell me privately if you don't feel up to posting here =P

right.

New year, same life. well, pretty much, anyway. since ORD, we are now officially out of the jurisdiction of the SAF, and our lives are pretty much our own (except for the ICT i'm already going for THIS year).

I've no job, I'm not studying, I'm not pursuing any active interest. I'm not on holiday, considering that I've just returned from one. And I'm not addicted to games. Strangely enough, I'm not bored. Life is what you make out of it.

Since my life is pretty boring, I'm not going to write about it here.

Instead, I'd like everyone who's free and has time on their hands to consider looking at their life, their memories, and get their minds in order. Consider your mentality and mindset, your thoughts and philosophy, maybe rethink it. Look at yourself in your entirety, your past, your present. Maybe go out and learn more about life itself, all the way until you are perfectly untroubled by most matters. Or until you run out of free time. Learn to accept.

All these years since adolescence and maturity, we've all found ourselves (or at least, I have) caught up in daily commitments: schooling, family, army. Such day-to-day worries and commitments caught us up in the heat of the moment, leaving us breathless without a pause to rest. Any breaks were used for rest and recreation. Then, we were taught to think about thinking (metacognition), but rarely did I find myself thinking about my own mindset. Now's the time. After twenty years of learning about the world, it's time to learn more about yourself. After two decades, if you haven't found out where you're going in life, perhaps it's time to.

Knowledge is gained by schooling, experience is gained by killing creeps. But how is wisdom gained? Certainly not by listening to me. Words of wisdom are pieces of knowledge, nothing more. Wisdom is gained by truly listening to yourself, although a certain degree of arrogance is gained as well from pursuing that path.

The above is an example of what happens when you think too much. You start rambling, but you remain content and feel perfectly at ease. Hurrah.

PS it has been empirically proven that playing slark does NOT cause the team to lose.

reshuffling, reorganising, rearranging

My mind's a huge jumble of mess now. Too many thoughts, too many things to do, too many things to write, too many things to complete. And worse thing of all is that i'm doing this at 4am in the morning under jet-lagged conditions with a brain that's too excited and won't calm down for me to smoothen out my thoughts. So now, i'm just catching whatever flies out of the mess and throwing them on a piece of paper(or computer) and hopefully i won't miss out anything. HOPEFULLY.

Ok this post is not meant to be a showcase of all the thoughts that are zooming about within the confined space of my skull. So i can guarantee more posts in the near future when i sort things out a little.

So what exactly is this post for? Nothing. Just throwing out a few pieces of mind jumble that came out flying out and looked like they should be posted. so here they are(still in a pretty messy state i think, but better).

Nice revamp of this site gerard. Looks different at one glance, but looks the same as the old one after a longer look. Except the memories slideshow. And the numbers at the top. 897. Any meaning to that? And there're small lines of words which i can't read. Any hidden code within? Haha

And beijing is not that cold, minimum -6 deg? You don't need 4 layers, though that will probably keep you comfortable. You probably didn't try what it feels like in less than 4. so let me give my experience.
Chicago was having a weird period of extreme cold the day i arrived. So normal chicago temperature of -3 to 1(based on last year) was sorely missed. Because the temperature was -20 to -12. The day i arrived was -17. I felt frozen(like seriously), but i was alive. It was tough and really painful to do many things, but i could breathe easily and walk easily. That said, i only had 2 layers on my body and 1 layer on my legs, and no gloves.
I was better prepared later in the day. I felt tempted to change to 4 layers(thermal underwear, t-shirt, hoodie, down jacket), but i was lazy so i went with 3 layers on body and still 1 layer on legs, with gloves this time around. I was perfectly fine. If you're really cold, all you need to do is to pop into a random shop, though i didn't really need to do that.

Furthermore, chicago is known as the 'windy city', and the wind is really f***ed up. That was 1 point in time i nearly fell down to a sudden faggot gust of wind. I'll talk more about this in a later post.

Hence, if 3 layers is fine in -17, i conclude that -6 has no need for 4. haha. ok besides the great wall where winds can be crazy and if you're feeling cold, there'll be no help for you. So bundling up in 4 layers would be smart.

And cool rard, you actually bothered with experimenting with the jade. I doubt many of us would have done so(don't pretend you would, dear readers), and i applaude the action. However, since you actually did, let me suggest a better way of doing that.

Instead of dropping it back in your hotel room, this is what you should have done.
When he was teaching you ppl to differentiate real and fake jade(something about shining some special kind of light and seeing if it's green right? i think i rmb), kindly ask if real jade smashes easily.
He would say NO.(jade is known for its toughness, and is even used in ancient times as weapons)
Then, 'accidentally' drop the free jade in front of him, and watch his fine-spun lie smash to pieces with the jade.
Take a photo of the initial expression on his face, and post it on failblog.org.
Kindly offer to clear up the mess, and ask if you could have a real piece of jade since he must have 'accidentally' mixed up his gift.
Happily leave with the new piece of jade(which he'll give to save his own face, and which has a 90% chance to be real so as to save face in front of all the other tourists).

Oh well, things always look so much easier on hindsight, isn't it?

Oh and i realise that of the last 100 posts, I have have more posts than everyone else combined(52-48), so if this blog is to stay alive, everybody needs to do something. NOT me all the time. And it's weird seeing a request for blog revival that is not written by me, considering all my previous requests have fallen on deaf ears or inactive hands.

Sorry, i'm having weird mood swings now. Need stabilisation. Will be back in awhile. And i hope there'll be a post by the time i come back.

lalala
ys