This is for Kelvin, since you requested it.
The oak table, polished till it glowed with a shiny sheen, was meticulously kept. Papers were tidily filed into ‘In’ and ‘Out’ trays, small, perfect icons like ‘Recycle Bin’ and ‘Internet Explorer’ were perfectly arranged into orderly rows with painstaking precision, and worst of all, every single woodgrain upon the table had been neatly labeled with tiny, neat handwriting before lamination.
Kevlin shuddered as he gingerly sat himself in the plush seat before the table, wondering what kind of madman would arrange his study so. The blind type, obviously. A disconcerting pair of white, milky eyes (how the heck do those eyes manage to bore into him when they have no pupils?) betrayed the blindness of the seer who sat across from Kevlin. The placid face betrayed no expression, the closed mouth spoke no words. It was totally silent within the study. Kevlin stared at the seer staring (he somehow managed to do it even when blind) at Kevlin staring at him staring…he decided not to break the sacred silence that reigned. It was a long moment, or perhaps it was a short hour, before the seer spoke.
“Wha-? I’m sorry, I must have fell asleep. Now, you Kevlin, you are here to obtain information as to the location of the Sha Tree which you quest for, no? I knew you were coming, so the fact that you did not make an appointment does not matter, as I have-“ here, his hand delved into the ‘Out’ tray, before fishing out a piece of paper, displaying it triumphantly, “-the itinerary, the air tickets, and accommodations all booked. Here, take a look.”
Receiving the piece of paper (why why why did it have to be so spotlessly clean, and the words typed out neatly in Times New Roman, font size 12?) from the seer, Kevlin stared upon the heading of ‘Birthday Horoscope’. Below were the words “On your birthday, Dragor, you shall meet Prince Charming, or, as we say in modern terms, Mr. Nice Guy. He will become the one most important person of your life, the one your life will revolve about, the one whom you have sought for so long…”
Kevlin stopped, because it was only good manners not to read the horoscopes of others. Impressed, he handed it back to the seer, asking incredulously, “Holy sh-“
“Strictly no vulgarities are allowed here. I do not allow Censorship to defile my sanctum by Censoring my clients,” the seer intoned.
“Er….beyond godlike!” Kevlin amended hastily. “You do birthday horoscopes? My birthday was several months ago. Can I have a belated horoscope too?”
The seer’s brow crinkled a moment in confusion, then understanding dawned upon his face. “My apologies, I must have handed you the wrong piece of paper by mistake. Not having vision can be quite inconvenient, you must understand. Now, a belated horoscope for your birthday? Sure.”
Kevlin received a small piece of paper from the seer. On it were written the words “Happy Birthday”. “You had your birthday several months ago, and it was a happy birthday, was it not?” the seer asked.
“True,” Kevlin conceded. “Can you make another prediction for me then? Like tell my future?”
The seer focused his milky white eyes upon Kevlin for a while, then withdrew a pack of cards from his drawer. “There are 52 cards here. Pick five of them. They shall tell your future.”
Kevlin picked five.
“Holy excrement,” the seer breathed, once Kevlin told him what cards he had picked. “Do you know what this means? Do you know what 5 Aces mean?”
“That the deck of cards is rigged?”
“Have you ever heard of the A. Levels? They form the sacred mountain in the far west, upon which the Sha Tree is believed to grow. The A Levels are a series of high plateaus, consisting of five in total, one upon the other, which no one has managed to scale. They are exceedingly hard to climb, and hold untold perils, of which no man has ever returned to speak of. People have managed to climb one or two levels in the past, having 1 or 2 As, and only one person has ever succeeded in getting 3As. You will be the first to surpass them all, to brave these nameless dangers and finally reach the High Joule Summit where the Sha Tree, the Tree of the World, grows!”
“Um Esc? Put it simply, what does it mean?”
“Pro!”
Kevlin shuddered as he gingerly sat himself in the plush seat before the table, wondering what kind of madman would arrange his study so. The blind type, obviously. A disconcerting pair of white, milky eyes (how the heck do those eyes manage to bore into him when they have no pupils?) betrayed the blindness of the seer who sat across from Kevlin. The placid face betrayed no expression, the closed mouth spoke no words. It was totally silent within the study. Kevlin stared at the seer staring (he somehow managed to do it even when blind) at Kevlin staring at him staring…he decided not to break the sacred silence that reigned. It was a long moment, or perhaps it was a short hour, before the seer spoke.
“Wha-? I’m sorry, I must have fell asleep. Now, you Kevlin, you are here to obtain information as to the location of the Sha Tree which you quest for, no? I knew you were coming, so the fact that you did not make an appointment does not matter, as I have-“ here, his hand delved into the ‘Out’ tray, before fishing out a piece of paper, displaying it triumphantly, “-the itinerary, the air tickets, and accommodations all booked. Here, take a look.”
Receiving the piece of paper (why why why did it have to be so spotlessly clean, and the words typed out neatly in Times New Roman, font size 12?) from the seer, Kevlin stared upon the heading of ‘Birthday Horoscope’. Below were the words “On your birthday, Dragor, you shall meet Prince Charming, or, as we say in modern terms, Mr. Nice Guy. He will become the one most important person of your life, the one your life will revolve about, the one whom you have sought for so long…”
Kevlin stopped, because it was only good manners not to read the horoscopes of others. Impressed, he handed it back to the seer, asking incredulously, “Holy sh-“
“Strictly no vulgarities are allowed here. I do not allow Censorship to defile my sanctum by Censoring my clients,” the seer intoned.
“Er….beyond godlike!” Kevlin amended hastily. “You do birthday horoscopes? My birthday was several months ago. Can I have a belated horoscope too?”
The seer’s brow crinkled a moment in confusion, then understanding dawned upon his face. “My apologies, I must have handed you the wrong piece of paper by mistake. Not having vision can be quite inconvenient, you must understand. Now, a belated horoscope for your birthday? Sure.”
Kevlin received a small piece of paper from the seer. On it were written the words “Happy Birthday”. “You had your birthday several months ago, and it was a happy birthday, was it not?” the seer asked.
“True,” Kevlin conceded. “Can you make another prediction for me then? Like tell my future?”
The seer focused his milky white eyes upon Kevlin for a while, then withdrew a pack of cards from his drawer. “There are 52 cards here. Pick five of them. They shall tell your future.”
Kevlin picked five.
“Holy excrement,” the seer breathed, once Kevlin told him what cards he had picked. “Do you know what this means? Do you know what 5 Aces mean?”
“That the deck of cards is rigged?”
“Have you ever heard of the A. Levels? They form the sacred mountain in the far west, upon which the Sha Tree is believed to grow. The A Levels are a series of high plateaus, consisting of five in total, one upon the other, which no one has managed to scale. They are exceedingly hard to climb, and hold untold perils, of which no man has ever returned to speak of. People have managed to climb one or two levels in the past, having 1 or 2 As, and only one person has ever succeeded in getting 3As. You will be the first to surpass them all, to brave these nameless dangers and finally reach the High Joule Summit where the Sha Tree, the Tree of the World, grows!”
“Um Esc? Put it simply, what does it mean?”
“Pro!”
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